Ever been in any of those uncomfortable situations where someone is doing all they can to get you to react violently or negatively, or to get you angry, but you sit there enduring it all and holding back? We are all humans, so I believe that we have all, at one time or the other, been in or experienced someone else be in this situation.
I remember experiencing someone in the situation. It was two years ago, I had gone to the place where I would pick a vehicle to take me to the Island, but it seemed like everyone's eyes were turned to a particular place. I followed their line of vision and saw one 'area boy', as they are popularly called in Nigeria, dragging a man by his collar and screaming for the man to give him money. The man neither replied nor tried to free his shirt from the grip of the area boy. This infuriated the boy who looked to be under the influence of alcohol or something worse. He started hitting the man in the torso while screaming for 'his money'. At this point, the man spoke to one of the people in his car, "Please, call Dele", he said.
As the hits to his chest became more consistent, he, using one hand, twisted the area boy's hand so the area boy was still holding his shirt by the collar but was turned away from the man. Some of his fellow area boys came closer, whether to intervene or to fight the man I don't know, but they moved away almost immediately as some military personnel drove into the place. It turns out that the man who was being hit was a military man who had come to pick up the kids of his superior and the area boy had confronted him to collect money from him for 'picking passengers on his(area boy's) turf. The military man had patiently waited for the boy to let him go but when he began receiving punches, he had to call for help.
After the area boy(thug) had been taken away along with the military personnel and the man who was harassed by the thug, some people began giving their opinion of what they would have done had they been in the shoes of the military man who had been harassed earlier. I got thinking. 'What made the man endure the embarrassment and the assault? Was it as a result of his military training? Or his personality? What made the thug continue hitting the man? Did he(thug) think that the man was a coward?'. I really don't know.
Dealing with people in my young years, I have learnt that patience is a virtue. And I have seen situations where acting, or actually being, a coward helped some people. But I have also learnt that people misinterpret a lot of things. Give them an inch and they'll take several. I am not advocating that we should have less patience towards people, or that we should act cowardly. Life is not really black or white. Not everything is clear-cut. It all depends on the situation. If you run the risk of being harmed, the best we can do is help ourselves out of that situation in the best way possible for everyone. Don't be foolish about it, people have lost their lives in similar situations if not less. There's a thin line between patience and cowardice. Patience has it's limits, take it too far and it becomes cowardice. Always trust your instincts.
- The Lady
“Have ye suffered so many things in vain? if it be yet in vain.”
Galatians 3:4
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