Personal Growth Through Self-Love

Photo Credit: Awed By Monica

"If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete." - VIO

As I say to all who ask, I am passionate about people. Seeing them grow and achieve their desired results gives me joy and I have decided to do all I can to inspire positive change in people, help people make better decisions and live better lives. But that end can only be achieved through commitment to some processes. The first of those processes being the knowing(more like understanding) of one's self, as there cannot be personal growth without in-depth knowledge and understanding  of one's self.

But can anyone really know himself/herself? That is not a question that can receive a simple yes or no answer. In truth, all we can do is to understand the way we think about, feel about, and perceive things. We really can't fully and completely know ourselves, but we can understand ourselves and that is a good enough start for me. Some might oppose this reasoning but be free to share your opinion in the comments section below.

Now, to really begin to understand yourself with the desired result of becoming a better person so as to enable you live a better life, you first have to understand the concept of self-love. "Ummm, I love myself already!" you may say. But take a break and think, do you really practice it? Do you show yourself that you love yourself? Do you make decisions that reflects this love in your life?

Don't be so quick to reply 'YES!' to all those questions. Consider all your thoughts, actions, and decisions you have made concerning yourself and your life in the past one month(Let's not go to far into the past.) While considering all those thoughts, actions, decisions, and all, consider if you would be happy about them if someone who 'claims' to love you had done them for/to you. Would your answers to those questions still be the same?

Would you have loved it if someone had had those thoughts about you? Would you have loved it if someone had done all those acts towards you? Would you have loved it if someone had made all those decisions that affected you in those ways? Honestly consider everything you have done that affects, and probably still affects, you personally. Do they reflect any atom of love for yourself?

If you can really begin to understand the concept of self-love as it affects everything you do for yourself, then you can begin to understand who you are and how to love yourself. Remember, your words, thoughts and actions towards yourself serves as a pointer for other people to emulate when it comes to their relationship with you.

Ergo, if people see/perceive that you love and respect yourself, they will relate with you with that same level, if not more, love and respect. But if they don't perceive any measure of self-love and self-respect, they will not bother being respectful or loving towards you. So, understand what you want for yourself, work towards getting what you want, and never stop letting people know that you understand and love yourself.

Personal growth begins with true understanding of one's self. Working on your conducts without focusing on understanding who you are is a form of hypocrisy that would eventually shine through in your actions, thereby causing avoidable problems. Work on understanding yourself and you will be able to grow as a person, with focus and direction.
Good luck with this step and have a great weekend! And for my Nigerians, have a happy Independence celebration.


- The Lady

“Be ye therefore followers of God, as dear children; And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.”

Ephesians 5:1-2